To Let Go

. . . is not to withdraw into denial or obliviousness but to enter into a state of acceptance. ... does not mean to stop caring; I can care and yet know that I can't "do it" for someone else. . . . does not mean to cut myself off from another person in my heart, although I can't control another person's responses or actions, I can keep my heart open. ... does not involve scolding, nagging, arguing or threatening another, but instead to search out my own shortcomings and make them the focus of my attention . . . . is not to "enable" a person to continue his or her pathological mistakes but to allow him or her to learn from the natural consequences of actions. ... is to give up arranging everything according to my own desires and take each day as it comes. ... is to admit powerlessness, which means that the outcome is not in my hands. . .. is not just to give up criticizing and regulating anybody but to bring back the dream I had of a universe I can trust. ... is not to manipulate or blame another it's an opportunity to take some time and make the most out of myself. . . . is not to enter into a time of regretting the past but to enter into a time of growing and living for a better future. ... is not the same as to remove myself to a distance and judge but just to allow another to be their version of what it is to be a "human being." . .. is not to give up my boundaries but to find boundaries which work better for me now than the old ones. ... is not to give up my expectations and accept someone else's but to give up unrealistic expectations. ... is not to abandon or condemn but to allow another to affect his or her own destiny. . .. is not to relinquish responsibility but to admit that we have taken on excessive responsibility. ... is not to desert or to forsake, but to permit another to face his or her own reality. . .. is not to compromise, accomodate, placate, yield, or concede but to fear less and love more.